What's Next? Why saying “goodbye” can set you up for a better future

If you’re like me, you love a good book. Especially if it has what I would call a happy ending. You start every book at the beginning, and the subsequent chapters lead you to what’s next. You cannot get to the end without experiencing all of the “in-between” moments. Those can be tedious, and maybe even a little boring. I have known people who love skipping straight to the end of the book before committing to reading all the chapters about the “in-between” times. 

But those middle chapters are what fill in all the details and explain the future that has to be revealed.

Wouldn’t it be nice if we could do the same thing in life? Skip to the end and if we like the way it looks, then we can choose to walk through all those tedious, sometimes frustrating, events that get us to that satisfying end.

Unfortunately, life is not like that.

Almost every chapter in life has unexpected, unplanned, surprising elements in it. We call them plot twists.

I had a very surprising plot twist a couple of months ago when I suffered a heart attack which required a stent placement. This was no a diagnosis I had seen coming, and I am still writing/walking through those “in-between” chapters. I have not seen where this event may wind up taking me, but I trust the Author of my story.

I am certain of one thing:
This is a new chapter!

But how do I finish out the old one? How can I close the previous chapter in a way that sets me up well to enjoy the fullness of this new one? I didn’t want to just rush through this and unknowingly skip over some potentially important detail.

There were three truths that helped me walk through this season of goodbyes in a healthy manner which prepared me for whatever is next. 

Can I share them with you?

1.    Goodbyes are a part of life
Having healthy attachments does not mean that you will never have to say goodbye. We should learn from an early age that a goodbye does not severe the connection. Our relationships continue in spite of them.

As we grow, we change. And changes almost always will involve saying goodbye to some person, activity, place, or job that we had formed an attachment to. 

In other words, the status quo never remains the status quo.

2.    A healthy goodbye clears the past from the path to the future
If you have spent time in the same city, job, church you probably have some situations that would benefit from being spoken about and cleared up. Misunderstandings, unfulfilled expectations, new passions or dreams are all reasons to have conversations to close out one chapter before starting the new one.

When you are preparing to leave, and you have the opportunity, take the time to thank the people you need to thank, cheer on the things that went well, and let go of what didn’t. This clears your pathway towards the new chapter and the future God is taking you towards.

3.    Make room for the emotions that need to be “felt”
This is a hard one for me. I tend to push down my emotions, but I’m learning that to be healthy in a new chapter, these feelings need to be seen and acknowledged, and then released.

Give yourself time to mourn what you may be losing. A relationship you’ve cultivated over a long time, a child you raised, a business you grew, these are all worthy of your emotional bandwidth. So, cry if you need to, feel sad, grieve and then be free to move on.

If you are in a season of change and are asking God what’s next for you, take some time to make sure you say some healthy goodbyes so that you can move on to that next chapter without regret.

You’ll see that what’s next is amazing!

If you're seeking God for your next step, World's Biggest Small Group offers FREE help using the Word of God to guide your journey. 

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