Goals can be easy to set but hard to achieve. That’s the lesson that I’ve been learning the hard way this year as I attempt to get myself to a healthier weight (I still miss you, metabolism!).

Instead of going the fad diet route this time, I decided to team up with some close friends who were trying to achieve the same thing so that we could hold each other accountable. As we met to talk about our plan, I heard myself saying some pretty terrible things:

“I’m so fat.”

“I’m so gross.”

“I just want to feel beautiful.”

Here’s the thing: I would never utter those words to another human being or say them about another woman. But for some reason, they leave my lips so naturally when I’m talking about myself!

I would never utter those words to another human. But they leave my lips so naturally when talking about myself! Share on X

So as we discussed our specific food goals, I decided to add a clause to my personal weight loss contract to hold myself accountable:

“Above all else, I will treat myself with kindness.

When I feel like I’m falling short and self doubt starts to creep in, I will speak to myself in the same positive way I speak to those around me.

I’ll work hard for my goals, but I won’t let them consume me. I’ll celebrate my victories, and I won’t let my missteps destroy me.

I’ll remind myself daily that joy is not tied to a number on the scale….and that no ideal size will ever make me who I am.”

As I began to tell others about my pledge, a personal trainer told me what she tells her clients and her 18-year-old daughter:

“You’re not allowed to say negative things about yourself out loud.”

I’m so guilty of this! In an attempt to boost my ego and fish for compliments, I put myself down. What if, instead, I use those moments to intentionally give myself a compliment?

How would that change me? How would it change those around me? How would it change my world?

What if spoke kindly about ourselves in the same way we speak kindly of others? Share on X

I know I won’t always be perfect at it, but I will work hard to fight the voice that that says I’m not enough…and remember that I am fearfully and wonderfully made.