Making the Most of Overlooked Opportunity

When parenting young children, my focus was short term – a week, a year, sometimes a day at a time. A child would begin kindergarten and my focus would broaden as I’d acknowledge time did indeed move quickly. At some point in elementary school, a teacher would hang artwork in the hallway with cardstock lettering that read, ‘Future class of _____’, and I’d startle while reading it for the first time. I’d stand there imagining my second grader as a high school graduate, and then I’d reassure myself there was no way – NO WAY – a decade would fly by.

My daughter is in the graduating class of 2020.

This is my second go-around with a high school senior. Two more will follow. As a parent of teenagers and a young adult, I find my focus most days is that of a coach. I’m encouraging long term habits and thought processes in my children so they can navigate life beyond me. Oddly, guiding my children into the future has strengthened my ability to live in a moment and appreciate it fully. I’m enjoying every opportunity we have together.

Opportunity is a frequent theme in my conversations with my children, particularly as each one nears the dream of adulthood. They live in a culture that asks for five year plans and career paths, as if life follows a linear map of goals and checkpoints, which I’ve found it rarely does. Life is often a road of detours and choices, keeping calm when I hit a dead end, and setting my sights on the next opportunity. I want my kids to know that.

Flexibility and resiliency hinge on the ability to see opportunity in its true form – ordinary, disguised, and often overlooked in the midst of circumstances or places less than ideal. In his letters to the Ephesians and the Colossians, Paul encourages his friends to ‘make the most of every opportunity.’ Writing from prison, his words suggest he’s keeping his head up and remaining focused; chained, but unrestricted from following opportunity like a compass, with confident hope God’s goodness is in it.

Paul’s spiritual focus on making the most of every opportunity models what faith truly is – a lifestyle of stepping out before I understand, before I’m guaranteed, before I can see the whole picture. Plans fail, expectations are interrupted by the unexpected, but I continue doing what I’m able, and trust God with the rest.

Paul wrote letters of encouragement to Christ followers. That was the opportunity available to him in prison. In the book of Genesis, Joseph interpreted dreams. Ruth gathered fallen grain behind harvesters. The stories of the faithful are stories of people responding to obstacles by choosing the unglamorous opportunity presented them and making the most of it.

Having trouble seeing opportunity in the obstacles? Me too. Here are 4 hidden opportunities I’ve discovered:

1. Triggers

Emotional reactions are trying to tell me something, and it’s often something worth hearing. When I take the time to dig, I find the deeper goings on. I haven’t forgiven someone who wronged me, I haven’t forgotten a shaming experience, I haven’t accepted a mistake or failure. Maybe I’ve avoided confronting an issue, person, or fear. When I ignore the opportunity to reflect on the ‘why’ of my reactions, whether I reflect in prayer, journaling, or in the safety of a trusting relationship, I forfeit an opportunity for healing.

 

We live tense, but tension speaks as well. A stomachache may indicate a negative relationship. A clenched jaw tells me I’m overwhelmed or overloaded. Tight fists or shoulders indicate stress. Tension awareness doesn’t lend opportunity to blame, it offers an opportunity to release a muscle, task, fixation, fear, unhealthy friendship, or need for control. Will that be the end of tension? Nope. But practicing release means less tension – and that’s a good thing.

 

Curiosity is a lost art. Pity, really. When my curiosity is quiet, my relationships, intellect, spiritual development, and even my sense of wonder stagnate. The Psalms are overflowing with questions – to God and to self. The gospels record Jesus’ miracles, as well as His many questions to unbelievers and seekers alike. Good questions, including those spoken or heard in prayer, invite opportunity to learn, strengthen, deepen, reveal, and expose. Even in exhaustion or confusion, one simple question often opens doors: ‘Will you help me?’

 

4. Fresh perspective.

I have focus issues. In school, that meant I was easily bored. In adulthood, it means I walk away from unfinished business. My attraction toward a new focus has benefits in my faith relationship, though. When I’m stuck, disappointed, bored, hung up on the unimportant, or frustrated, I take the opportunity to pray for a fresh perspective. ‘Help me see this differently!’ has become a frequent prayer – in fact, I said it this morning – and in His grace, God gives me insight or a different point of view so I can move forward, ready and willing for His next opportunity.