31% of U.S. adults are lonely every single day.

That might be a depressing statistic, but it doesn’t mean loneliness is inevitable. As Christians, we have a loving Father, a gracious Savior, and a Spirit dwelling within us. The Scriptures encourage us to gather, love, pray, and bear each other’s burdens.

Allow me to share how God’s presence and power can help you feel less alone this holiday season.

The Problem

In studying this topic, I’ve come to the conclusion that our modern loneliness epidemic stems from this: We chose what was easier, and it left us lonelier.

We embraced convenience at the cost of connection. We grocery shop online instead of rubbing shoulders with fellow shoppers. We eat dinner with our devices on the table instead of giving others our undivided attention. We Zoom from our home offices instead of gathering with coworkers in the conference room. We never face or fix the flaws that push friends and family away from us. We livestream the Sunday service alone instead of squeezing into a church pew with others.

Do you see my point? Choosing the more convenient path has consequences. Choosing what’s easier leaves us feeling isolated.

God’s Solution

If you are a Christian, a person who has repented of your sins and believes the gospel, you have the best blessing in the universe—the presence of God. Despite how you may feel on any given day, God goes before you, stands behind you, walks beside you, reigns above you, remains beneath you, and lives within you.

God, who is steadfast and faithful, promises to never leave you.

“For God has said, ‘I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.'” | Hebrews 13:5 (NLT)

This promise holds in any situation: alone at lunch, uninvited to a party, or during lonely holiday seasons. Being in God’s presence means you are never truly alone.

Fighting Loneliness with Togetherness

Good friends make everything better. Busy people make friendships worse.

You must fight your busyness for the sake of better relationships. That might sound like an impossible task, given everything on your plate, but before you throw up your hands in despair, use those same hands to do one tiny thing—check your screen time.

This is why I am begging you to fight for face-to-face friendships, following the example of the apostle John, who wrote:

“I have much to write to you, but I do not want to use paper and ink. Instead, I hope to visit you and talk with you face to face, so that our joy may be complete” | 2 John 1:12 (NLT)

John knew that there are levels of joy that are only reached when we spend time face-to-face. That’s why I want you to fight for such friendships.

Take as much time as you need to get together with your friends and family. Enough of the vague, “Let’s get together sometime.” Get out your calendar, find a time that works, and protect that sacred time with your life.

In his book Made for People, Justin Whitmel Earley reminds us that a schedule has “saving power.” Regularly scheduled events, whether that’s an annual fishing trip with your guys, monthly book club with your girlfriends, or Christmas gatherings, can save you from the slow drift of a busy life.

The night before he died, Jesus said:

“I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends” | John 15:10 (NLT)

A friend is someone who, under no compulsion, prefers your presence. That is what Jesus is. He had no need for you and me, yet he still longed to be with us. Not simply as Lord, King, and Master but as our Friend.

May God grant you a few good friends, and may he also remind you of the Friend whom Jesus already is! I pray that you find time for intentional connection this holiday season.

Excerpt taken from Lonely Less: 6 Steps to a Less Lonely Life by Mike Novotny (© 2024 Time of Grace Ministry).

A Beautifully Broken Christmas